A Lenten Reading of Matthew - Day Seven

Scripture Reading: Matthew 5:21-48 (NRSVUE)

This may be a true statement. How is Jesus
asking us to go beyond it?

As we continue with Jesus' Sermon on the Mount, we find that today's teaching seems to be about taking our relationships seriously.  In today's society, with increased polarization, the ending or cutting off of relationships seems to be trending.  

According to Bowen's Family Systems Theory, this is not a healthy response to relationship.  In the first century, people didn't have the mobility that we experience today.  So, maintaining healthy relationships was important for everyone involved because of proximity.

Jesus mentions reconciliation and states that we should be careful when angry with someone that we don't call them derogatory names.  I'm reflecting on how often "fool" or other derivatives enter my mind during the day.  My guess is that we could all do better here.

Prohibitions on adultery and divorce are also relational.  Of course, these came out of a patriarchal system where a man could divorce a woman, but the reverse was not a possibility.  The disallowance of divorce was a leveling of power between gender - it didn't make them equal, but it was a movement.

Jesus seems to ask for us to have integrity in our relationships (imagine that!) where we can be taken at our word.  He doesn't want us to bring God into the mix for our convincing arguments.  Jesus sees this as a misuse of God's name which is prohibited in the Ten!

Retaliation makes the whole world blind and toothless. Jesus recognizes that when there are power differentials such as between a Roman soldier and a Jewish citizen, one might get on top of the abuse by asserting one's freedom of choice to go beyond what was being asked.  Take the power back!

Finally, we are asked to love our enemies.  Jesus is not talking about love as a feeling as much as love as an action.  If we believe God loves them, can we remember that as we interact with them?  

As we reflect on the Beatitudes at the beginning of the sermon, adopting humility, mercy and peacemaking can move us a long way toward accomplishing all that Jesus lines out for us here.

In reviewing the different pieces of today's reading, which causes you the most heartburn?  Why do you think that is?  If someone were to be able to accomplish all that Jesus lines out here, that person would be strong indeed.  This person would have a sense of self - identity - that others could not take away with their words or actions.  They would practice healthy boundaries.  They would seek to make the world a better place just by being in it.  I pray for this strength for you today.

Prayer for the day:

You have called us, O God, to be your people.  You have loved us and chosen us for your own.  Clothe us with your compassion, your kindness, your humility, your gentleness and your patience.  Help us forgive one another as you have forgiven us.  And bind us all together in perfect unity of your love. Amen.

Prayer adapted from Colossians 3:12-14 (Good News Bible)

Photo by PINKE via Flickr.com.  Used under the Creative Commons license.

 

Daily Devotion for Lent 2024, Day 12

“You have heard that it was said to those of ancient times, ‘You shall not murder,’ and ‘whoever murders shall be liable to judgment.’ But I say to you that if you are angry with a brother or sister, you will be liable to judgment, and if you insult a brother or sister, you will be liable to the council, and if you say, ‘You fool,’ you will be liable to the hell of fire.  So when you are offering your gift at the altar, if you remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother or sister, and then come and offer your gift.  Come to terms quickly with your accuser while you are on the way to court with him, or your accuser may hand you over to the judge and the judge to the guard, and you will be thrown into prison.  Truly I tell you, you will never get out until you have paid the last penny."

                                                                    Matthew 5:21-26 (NRSVue)

What if you say worse than, "You fool?"  

Jesus has quit preaching and gone to meddling as the old joke goes.  In today's culture, we seem to go quickly from zero to sixty in a matter of seconds with regards to things getting heated or under our skin.

I hear people describing behavior as toxic when it really is just disagreement.  

We are quick to cut off relationships if any speed bump comes along.  

What happens to society when we view people or at least our affiliations with them as disposable?

Fortunately, I believe that Jesus' crowd probably had much the same reaction as we do today.  There was a lot more pressure then - their stresses came in the way of not having enough food to feed their families.  In order to earn money, they may have had to work or rub shoulders with the foreign occupiers of their country.  It may have been easy for those who did have enough to shun those who didn't for this very behavior.  And of course, in an interconnected society, the amount of capitulation always comes in degrees.

So today's message from Jesus may be hard but it is flat-out good advice for stability of a community on any scale.  

Sometimes a real fight begins through silliness.

From a Family Systems perspective, the unhealthy responses to difficulty in any relationship vacillate between being fused (where you are so close to the person, neither of you function well independently) and being cut-off (where you end the relationship entirely).

The healthy response is to maintain relationship while keeping safe boundaries.   This requires mutual respect and forgiveness.  To be clear, when a person is in a relationship that is truly harmful, it is important to distance so that health can be restored.  But I wonder if we are more sensitive to slight as a people than we used to be.  Is it a spiritual discipline to give the benefit of the doubt?

We cannot change someone else's behavior, but we can change our response.  We don't have to respond with slur or slander or even subtle dig.  We don't have to take it up a notch.  We don't have to lay waste to the situation so that they'll never mess with us again.

Many sermons today will re-emphasize their point throughout the sermon in different ways.  If you review the beatitudes, how many do you see present in today's verses?

During Lent, may we review some of the relationships that have ended.  Jesus seems to be saying that reconciliation may be the greatest gift we can give to God.  After all, what good parent wants to see their children fight?

Prayer for the day: Warm-hearted God, help us to see others through your eyes.  And let us hear people as you hear them.  When we find ourselves offended, may we take a second or a third look before we act upon it.  And when lines have been crossed, may we find the strength to pursue reconciliation.  We pray this in Jesus' name.  Amen.

 

Photo by Tony Kennick via Flickr.com.  Used under the Creative Commons license.

New Revised Standard Version, Updated Edition. Copyright © 2021 National Council of Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.